.

"is it okay to love someone too much?"


"why not?"


"it will hurt."


"are you afraid of being hurt?"


"are you?"


"no."


"..."


"hey. it's okay."

it's WORTH the wait.it is.

so I just checked out my girl blog, juzijuz, and suddenly remember that I have one of the this thing called blog, too! what a forgetful person I am.ha.ha.

it's 144 days since my last post and things have been happened.
yeah, things.
like the fact that am having a boyfriend now and he's kinda been my crush,since,well years,and the fact that NOW I'm having the time of my life. *yeah, now I'm pretending to be cool and typing such story above without emotions.u don't wanna know my real face I make now.najong.

I'd like to call him Mr.R, since his first name started with R and when people ask "what R stands for?" I can answer it flawlessly, "Mr.Right." asoyyy. Carrie can have her Mr.Big.

I once make him a poem.yeah, a poem. When I read it over again, feels like....,well,surely disgusted looking my own face in the mirror, but seriously, I mostly feel graceful. and blessed. and knowing that he ever prayed the same pray as I did, is, u know, amazing. It's beyond words. even a single heart can't handle it.

so for you guys who's on the wait,, well,wait. wait for it while having a nice cone of strawberry ice cream or while sliding on the slippery wet-rained floor. because I've waited. I've prayed. and I've been heard:)


this is the poem, btw.

if love could be chosen myself
I would choose Zac Efron
nobody would be curious on why I fall in love with him.

if love could be chosen myself
I would choose that lousy senior I just met
he doesn't know what's in me, my pasts, and my stories.

if love could be chosen myself
I would choose the naughtiest boy that smoked on the corner of the campus
so naughty, so I don't have to protect him from his nasty friends anymore.

if love could be chosen myself
I would choose my Facebook-chat friend
'cuz if this love finally failed, nothing such precious, let's say a
friendship, will be broken.

if love could be chosen myself
I would choose my handsome ex-boyfriend
I'm sure, he's much more easier for me to tame (muahahahahaaXD).

but 1 thing for sure
if love could be chosen myself
I would NEVER choose you
because you...,
you're no the lousy senior, or that naughty boy, or my Facebook-chat
friend, or my handsome ex, and clearly, not Zac Efron.
because you...,
are you.
you are perfectly out of reach.

but,
I think I don't have any choises, do I?

*made for him.*

Surabaya, 12 November 2009